The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
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