HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
