Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
