I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize