Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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