Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Even my vagina gasped.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
