It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
