literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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