Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize