I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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