Walk of Shame. In a state park.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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