As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
