Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Randomize
