honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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