I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
