You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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