she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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