Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
