so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
