His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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