The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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