do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
