Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize