You can't special order awesome
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
