You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
