This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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