I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
