Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
