her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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