Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Fuck appropriateness.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
