He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize