its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize