"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
well, you know. whores of a feather.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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