I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
