My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
