508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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