I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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