She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Randomize
