bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
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