we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
