Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
