why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I need moral support for this bender
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
We have started to decorate penises.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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