so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
How external is "for external use only"?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize