i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
