so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
