But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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