I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
