1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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