3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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