this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
You need a sexual gate keeper
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
