If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
