I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I love having hate sex.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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